Mother’s Day Card

I went to the store yesterday to buy a Mother’s Day card. So I walk into the store and there’s a bunch of girls in front of the cards reading every card. I walk up the the cards, pick one up, give a glancing over, and declare it good. Now I’m waiting on line to pay. It was a long line. By the time I got out of there, the same bunch of girls were still trying to decide what cards to buy.
What does it matter if you spend fifteen seconds picking out a card or one hour picking out a card? The person is either going to like it or not. If they don’t like it, then they’re mad you gave them a crappy card and your pissed cause you spent all that time either buying a crappy card, or the person that received¬† the card has bad taste. So just give them any card, the results are going to be the same.

Advertisements

Crazy Ed

Lately I’ve been watching The “Ed Show.” I try to see what the right is saying and the left is saying.
I noticed a couple of things about his show. He loves to talk about Fox news a lot. That’s not a good thing for him. Never talk about the competition. I never hear Fox talk about MSNBC. Also, Ed will come out with these statements without anything to back them up. Glenn Beck is a psycho paranoia. At least he tells you why he feels the way he does. Ed just says stuff like, “Aren’t you glad Obama is keeping us safe.” He is unless you want to count the underwear bomber, the Fort Hood Shootings and now the Times Square bomb. Good thing none of the bombs went off.

Ripped Jeans

I was over some body’s house a couple of weeks ago. There were some people that came from money. The wife was all dressed up, jewelery , hair, makeup, nice blouse, heels and ripped jeans. They looked like they were expensive jeans also. She must have paid big bucks for them.
I never got this look. What is it suppose to mean? I got a lot of money but I’m just like you, I dress in ripped jeans.
It looks funny. You could tell it’s not a natural rip in them. It looks like somebody cut them with a razor blade.
If she wanted to show that she was like everybody else, she should have worn, tee shirt, shorts and sneakers. And leave all the jewelery behind.

Ralph Rumpelton’s Lost Paintings

While digging in the caves of Scotland in 1941,Drew McMooly made the discovery of the century, the Lost Paintings of Ralph Rumpelton. With is trusty 8mm camera Drew started filming.
What baffled critics is how can somebody from 1902 make paintings from album covers that came out in the future. It’s been said that Ralph Rumpelton was ahead of his time. Category:

Hit Her With A Tile

I just came back from Home Depot. This family in the parking lot was walking in front of me arguing. They must have had a good fight in their car on the way to Home Depot. The guy had a tile in his hand and was walking in back of his wife. He raised his hand and I thought he was going to let her have it right in the back of the head. I thought he was going to do it cause his face was all red and steam was coming out of his ears. I’m glad he didn’t hit her from the back. I think if they were face to face she would give him a beating.

Bob Dylan’s “Down In The Groove”

I was giving “Down In The Groove” a listen. This got really bad reviews, and I
agree it’s not Dylan’s best. I have no problem with the songs, it’s just tough
to listen to with the 80’s production.
Here’s what I was thinking. Dylan should give the master tapes of “Down In The
Groove” and “Empire Burlesque” to Daniel Lanois and have him reproduce it, give
it the Lanois touch. They would be a lot easier on the ears then.
He shouldn’t even bother with “Knocked out Loaded.” Besides “Brownsville Girl”
there’s not much worth saving.

The Cashier

I went to Sears Hardware store to day to buy some hardware for my dining room table. After five minutes I found a sales person. I had to get certain bolts and screws. My dining room table is one of these put together furniture. After awhile the hardware breaks and the chairs become shaky. I bought this hardware before there so I know they had it. I was explaining to him what I needed. He had no idea what I was talking about. I even drew him a picture. He was still lost. So I kept looking in the store and found the hardware.
Now comes the funny part. I bring it up to the cashier and she says to me, “How much are these?” I told her, “I think they’re sixty five cents apiece.” “She said, “That’s close enough.”
It’s not entirely her fault for not knowing the price. There was no barcode on them. I could have said any price, she wouldn’t care. She just wanted me out of the store so she could keep on talking to her friends.